Many of us begin the twin flame journey with a need to fill a void left by what we believe to be our missing other half. We are certain that the other--the one, our one--is somewhere in the world and whether we are aware of it or not we set ourselves on a path that surpasses the boundaries we encounter with the perception of others. 

Ultimately, though, most of us come to realize that we are both the perception and our own other half.

By pursuing the idea of another person--an idealized romantic partner--waiting to complete us, we postpone our ability to grow into our wholeness, which can be compared to the wondrous process by which a caterpillar morphs into a butterfly.

"To become a butterfly, a caterpillar first digests itself."

The process of it can be gruesome. Just like a caterpillar enters a death sleep during transformation, we sometimes experience what is called a "dark night of the soul," where much of what we hoped for fades away. However, hidden within a dark night of the soul is an inner crucible of transformation. As follows the caterpillar's death, we too are reborn into something beautiful and light and we no longer search for another to complete us.

Ironically, delaying the procedure of finding our other half within ourselves first--and not chasing what's outside--also hinders us from recognizing a true sacred partner who can only be found in wholeness. 

A true sacred relationship is a relationship in which we "see" the divine in our partner and experience oneness--not wholeness or completeness--but oneness through our union of two.

Sacredness is knowing who we really are.

Blessings and love,


Mary Dunlop's latest book, 'Betsey's Retreat: The Power of Twin Soul Love Book II,' is available at and all Amazon online stores.

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